Mary, the heroine, is a widow. Her son, Billy, is 9 years old. John, the hero, is a professional baseball player.
“You want to have a catch, Billy?”
“It won’t work.”
“What won’t work?”
“You…trying to bond with me. I don’t need a daddy. I’m giving you the 'take sign' on that daddy business.”
“Hold on buddy, before you start heading for the clubhouse, that’s a mighty big leap from asking you to have a catch to me marrying your mother. That’s like stealing home from second base.”
“In that case, just consider me the cutoff man. I’m going to hold you on first to stop you from getting into scoring position.”
“You sure sound older than your age. Are you sure you’re in Little League?”
“Is that fair to your mother?”
“Life’s not fair or my daddy wouldn’t be dead. Beside it’s a lot fairer than you think. I won’t divorce my mom, I won’t run off and leave her and I won’t abuse her. I’m a better deal than a husband.”
“But your mother loves me.”
“You've got hormones going for you. I've got heredity. I’d say I’d win this game.”
“Boy, you’re a hard kid. I bet you got one mean brush-back pitch. Tell me, do you just not like me? I could get you into the Cardinal games. You could meet all the guys.”
“I don’t particularly admire men who play a kid’s game for a living.”
“Hey, boy, I make more money than ten typical daddies.”
“Until you throw your arm out. Then you’ll be selling used cars on tv like that other ball player.”
“Ted makes a good living selling those cars.”
“Good, maybe he can give you a job when the time comes.”
“Well, Billy, I can see I’m not going to have any luck winning you over now am I?”
“About as much chance as pitching a perfect game.”
“I have a no-hitter, you know. I could pitch a perfect game one of these days.”
“Come back when you do.”
“Why couldn’t you have been an adorable little kid in desperate need of a daddy who loves playing the matchmaker?”
“It has to do with conflict. Have you ever heard of a black moment?”
“Like when you balk with a man on third in the bottom of the night with the score tied?”
“That will do.”
“Well, what about it?”
"Consider me a ‘black eternity’."
Black Moment
I would smack that kid silly, no questions asked.
ReplyDeleteHi Marlena:
ReplyDeleteI’m not sure that is the way to win the heroine’s heart. I think this is a real ‘black moment’ and a smart hero should be able to win the kid over but not with arguments and not with bribes.
If I were the hero I would agree with the kid and then little by little plant doubts in the kids mind so that the kid comes to the right conclusion on his own.
“By the way, what’s your plan if you mother becomes sick or disabled and can’t take care of herself?”
Vince